Abused?

Hi Maia – first of all, you have not done anything wrong. Secondly, you do certainly do not need to be punished in any respect.

Okay, so you were naive. This guy told you what you wanted to hear so you would trust him even more – grooming – as Bella has said. Learn from the experience, you need to be assertive in situations like that, it can certainly go too far too quick. Don’t place yourself into that situation if you can’t control it. It doesn’t matter if a guy you meet goes to Church or not, going to Church does not always instil honesty, integrity and respect.

You must ask yourself, and answer yourself honestly though – did you not say ‘no’ or protest because you may have been curious yourself, or was it because you were genuinely in shock and did not know how to react? At 16 there is nothing wrong with being curious as long as you are in control of the situation and know when to stop. There is nothing to feel guilty about, but from what I can gather from your post perhaps you would be made to feel guilty by the people around you? Some guys will try it on with you and see how far they can get before you say ‘no’ or ‘stop’. Unfortunately at your age, there will be many guys out there who just want your friendship to try and get into your pants. Also though, there will also be guys out there who will want you as a genuine friend and respect you, and won’t do anything that you do not want to.

Sometimes it is difficult to try and determine whether someone is genuine or not, but I am sure you have learned from this experience. You have absolutely no reason to feel guilty. When the right guy and the right moment comes along, you will not mind being touched on your stomach, if being touched is what you want.

As far as this guy is concerned, I think you should cool it off and not hang out alone with him. If he asks why, tell him that you don’t trust him and do not want to spend time alone together.

I think you feel scared for several reasons: you were not in control of a situation that could have gone much further; you are venturing into unknown territory and do not know how to react; you have feelings of guilt because of what other people will think of you especially your parents; you have been brought up with a strict protocol of right and wrong and you feel as if you are doing bad things. When you see this guy at school you have these feelings of anxiety that make you want to run away.

Okay, so learn how to be assertive – practice speaking out when in the company of your friends and expressing your opinion. When something affects how you feel, express yourself. Let others know how you feel. Practice saying ‘no’ or ‘I do not want to’ or ‘yes, I would like that’. As Bella suggests, learn self defence, this will give you much more confidence. Don’t get into personal situations that you will not be able to control. Remember that a lot of guy’s intentions is to get into your pants and some will say and do anything to get there.

Anyway, chill. You have nothing to feel guilty about.

Take care, best wishes.

I have mind problems or something weird, pls read and help

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jealousy filled hatred

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My mum is cheater! what can i do???!

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Stressed and depressed

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Controlling Boyfriend

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Why can't I like myself?

anorexia at eleven, which later progressed to bulimia when I was thirteen. I also self-harmed.
extremely suicidal.

See, I've been looking at photo albums. Me, at the ages of thirteen, fourteen, fifteen. My sallow, silver eyes; my black hair and crazy, silver outfits. I looked good. I was interesting; I adored moonlight and rock music and horror films. I was a sullen, sad, gloomy little thing.
I was looking at some conversations I had on Facebook a couple of years ago. I was so funny. There was this boy. This one boy, who I love so much. He was as lost as me. He used to talk to me about his secrets.
He had black hair, too. And he wanted to date me. So did three other boys.
I guess it's because I always made people laugh, despite the darkness in myself. I mean, I thought that I was flawed. You have no idea.

A lot of girls bullied me, but now I'm beginning to think that they might have just been kind of jealous... I was unique and special and kind.
And I was always in some dreaming state.

In the last year of high school, I was fed up. I did crazy things and I got drunk and I skipped school (to go to the library. Ha.) but I was fed up of everybody; shallow relationships and lies.
School ended.

And now I'm left with nothing at all.
No magic.
No rock music.
No depth.

I've grown. Taller. A lot taller. My hair is now shawn down to my shoulders, and it's its original brunette colour.
And I don't care about what I wear anymore. Sometimes I just wear my pink pyjama tops. Because, whatever.
I don't have any friends anymore, which is cool I guess. If they can't accept me, then, whatever. But it's just kind of sad.
I've grown from my best friend of eleven years, from my high school friends, from my magical dark haired angel who took me to rock concerts in the moonlight.
I'm still "ME". But ever since I started to accept myself, I seem to have lost my spark; my magic, my depth. No love, no passion. I miss it all.
I miss the lost, gloomy, "depressing" darkness in my soul. Now it's just, nothing.

My dark-haired angel no longer likes me.
I guess I mean this: I spent years loathing who I was, when I was actually very awesome.
And now I'm having a hard time accepting myself because I seem to have lost my magic; nobody seems to like me anymore. That wouldn't have mattered to me so much, had I not loved my friends. Had they not meant so much to me. Dig?

I feel like dropping out of high school ; should I ?

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Is my friend stuck in a fantasy world?

A few months ago, me and my best friend signed up for a story-sharing website, known as Wattpad. You can make and create stories, and read others' stories as well. It's pretty entertaining, but I fear my friend is taking it too far.

She has created a story that involves fantasy characters, i.e. Jack Frost. She also makes up her own mythological characters, and writes about them. At first, it all seemed like good fun, and I was happy because she was happy.

My concern is that she is starting to act as if they are "real" (i'm using this term lightly). She writes the story as if it were a play. What's more is that she incorporates pop culture into her story, and she (the author, whom she dubs herself "Clover") interacts with people from movies such as Harry Potter and One Direction. I know this sounds confusing and/or crazy, but please bear with me.

Below is an excerpt from her profile (she was replying to a comment on her chapter that featured HP characters):

Yesh, I was thinking y didn't I get mah acceptance letter. and POOF! There was Winter in Hogwarts. Draco will marry me some day

I'm really afraid of going to school ???

SORRY THIS IS A LOT TO READ! IF YOU TOOK THE TIME TO READ IT THAT WILL BE GREAT BUT IF YOU DIDN'T . . . I completely understand people always ignore anyways . . . ;(

Okay vacation ended about 3 days ago and I can't really bring myself to go to school to face everyone. The fact is that I'm overweight because in my previous doctor visits, my doctor's told me to start drinking more water and exercise regularly. I'm a very shy person at school and have almost no friends since they've either moved away or just started ignoring me. It doesn't really help that I can feel the stares they give me when I pass by them and my family has always made jokes in front of me of the fact that I'm chubby and they laugh at me and they hurt my feelings because I'm not really content with myself and it just confirms my fears about what they think about me. Especially my mom, since I overheard her saying that she's disappointed at me and that I'm fat and I need to lose weight. I kind of feel like shouting at her that I know because my old clothes don't fit me at all anymore.

I don't know why but whenever I come back from a long break from school I make up excuses not to go. It's just that I feel like everyone's watching and see me mess up and my palms get all sweaty and I start breathing really fast and I begged my mom not to let me go because I felt trapped (I'm claustrophobic) like something bad was going to happen, I felt like something was crawling all over my skin. I just wanted to get away.

I return to school tomorrow and I feel really anxious and I feel like I need to get help. Sometimes I have flashbacks from when I was bullied because of how I looked and everything. Mostly I think the world would be better if I hadn't been born such as not to cause anybody anymore problems than I already have.

PLEASE! I'm begging you! Your the only last source of help that I have right now!!!!!!! Does anybody have any advice?? :(

why is pc answers closing down?

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Shed a Light of Hope

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Teenager feeling depressed

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How do I love life again?

Hi, please Help!

The last time I felt truely happy, was 3 years ago when I lived in another country surrounded by completely different people. But now I am stuck in a rut, in my home town (where i didn't like to be the first time around)

I keep picturing what I want from my life. I want to meet a guy and fall in love and get married and have kids. The way my life is going, I don't see this happening.

I don't have many friends. It's not that I am not a friendly person, but I don't trust people, and when I do, they inevitably let me down. I know I probably set them up for failure and this is something I am working on. When I picture my wedding day, I can't see very many people on the brides side of the church and it makes me sad.

Because I don't have many friends, I don't really have a social life. In some ways I like that, I am a hermit at heart and like my own company, but i am young and would like to have a group of people who I could do things with. I would love to have a social life

I feel like I have given up on life, and waiting for death (though I'm not suicidal at all). Other than eating sleeping and going to work. I watch TV, I play on the internet. How do I get myself back out into the world. How do get myself a group of friends that share common interests? How do I meet a guy to share the rest of my life with? How do I love life again?

add and marijuana use

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Saying Goodbye... For Now

It's been a pleasure hosting this service over the past three years at Psych Central. However, for now, the time has come to move on. The thriving community of hundreds of people answering one another's questions just never happened, despite our best effort and no lack of new and interesting questions. And dealing with certain housekeeping chores was becoming burdensome, technically-challenging and time-consuming.

I want to thank bella, Clyde, Chemar, and Edahn for trying their best to help others and providing thousands of answers to people seeking advice and guidance.

We never say never around here, so there's always the possibility that we will bring this service back sometime in the future. But for now, we're shutting it down.

In the meantime, if you're looking for another place on Psych Central to ask a question of others, we actually do have such a place on our forums (or click on "Community" in the menu above):

http://forums.psychcentral.com/

You'll need to register for a new account there (it uses a different registration system than Answers) if you don't already have one on the forums. But it's just as easy to ask a question there, and of course, free.

On behalf of Psych Central, I wish you all the best.

Seeing violent images

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Kevin Ware's Broken Leg May Be Caused by Stress Fractures

Louisville basketball player Kevin Ware's horrific leg fracture was a freak accident that may have been exacerbated by previously undetected stress fractures.

"He came down hard, landing in an awkward way," said Dr. Robert Glatter, an emergency physician at Lenox Hill Hospital in New York and a former sideline physician for the New York Jets football team. "That combined with an underlying bone issue or an existing stress fracture predisposes someone to this type of injury."

Tim Hewett, director of sports medicine research at Ohio State University agreed. He speculated that Ware's diet could have been deficient in vitamin D and calcium leading to more porous bones. That, combined with the constant pounding Ware endured through an entire season of basketball, may have created small stress fractures in the tibia and fibula bones in his lower leg, causing his bone to snap when he took a bad step.

"Watching the video tape over and over, I would not expect this type of fracture to occur. I suspect he had some risk factors that created some sort of bone deficit," he said.

Glatter said an open fracture where the bone protrudes through the skin are exceedingly rare in sports.

"They're more commonly seen in car accidents where the shin smashes against the lower part of the dashboard or when someone jumps from a height like in parachuting," he said.

Hewett said that even in football, where athletes are more likely to hit at a high velocity with great force, open fractures aren't a common injury.

"You almost never see it in basketball, but you do see one or two a season in football," he said.

Former Washington Redskins quarterback Joe Theisman famously sustained a broken leg on "Monday Night Football" in a game against the New York Giants in 1985 when he was tackled by Lawrence Taylor. In 2006, Michael Bush, a star running back for the Louisville Cardinals, snapped his tibia in two during a routine play and was forced to sit out two full seasons as a pro while it healed.

Ware, 20, underwent successful surgery at Methodist Hospital in Indianapolis Sunday night to repair the open fracture of his right tibia that he sustained during Sunday's NCAA Midwest Regional final.

In an operation that lasted about two hours, his bone was reset and a rod was inserted into his leg to stabilize the injury as it heals. The puncture wound caused by the bone ripping through the skin in his lower leg was also closed.

Ware's injury is known as an open fracture because the fracture site was exposed to outside air. The injury was classified as a "compound" fracture, the most dramatic type of open fracture, because the bone broke through the shin and was plainly exposed as he lay on the court.

Compound fractures are a particularly dangerous injury, Glatter warned.

"Any time you expose bone to debris, dirt and bacteria, the chance of infection is exceedingly high," he said.

An infection in the bone can lead to potential issues with bone healing. The wound must be cleaned and antibiotics administered as soon as possible after the injury has occurred, Glatter said, but even then chance of infection can remain high during the healing process.

The rod will remain in his leg as long as six months, depending on how quickly the bone heals. Nerve damage, loss of motor control and loss of function in the lower leg and foot are also possible complications according to both Glatter and Hewett.

However, Glatter said that if Ware is generally healthy with no serious underlying medical conditions he could be back on the court within a year – maybe even as soon as three to six months if his recovery process goes smoothly.

"This is a devastating injury but it doesn't have to end his career," Glatter said.