The last time I felt truely happy, was 3 years ago when I lived in another country surrounded by completely different people. But now I am stuck in a rut, in my home town (where i didn't like to be the first time around)
I keep picturing what I want from my life. I want to meet a guy and fall in love and get married and have kids. The way my life is going, I don't see this happening.
I don't have many friends. It's not that I am not a friendly person, but I don't trust people, and when I do, they inevitably let me down. I know I probably set them up for failure and this is something I am working on. When I picture my wedding day, I can't see very many people on the brides side of the church and it makes me sad.
Because I don't have many friends, I don't really have a social life. In some ways I like that, I am a hermit at heart and like my own company, but i am young and would like to have a group of people who I could do things with. I would love to have a social life
I feel like I have given up on life, and waiting for death (though I'm not suicidal at all). Other than eating sleeping and going to work. I watch TV, I play on the internet. How do I get myself back out into the world. How do get myself a group of friends that share common interests? How do I meet a guy to share the rest of my life with? How do I love life again?
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