getting older -

Repairing Hearts & Getting Older



A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop.

The surgeon was there, waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike.

The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey, Doc, can I ask you a question?"

The surgeon a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle.. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take the valves out, fix 'em, put 'em back in, and when I finish, it works just like new. So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing basically the same work?"

The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic... "Try doing it with the engine running."

***********************************************





A distraught senior citizen

phoned her doctor's office.

"Is it true," she wanted to know,

"that the medication

you prescribed has to be taken

for the rest of my life?"

"'Yes, I'm afraid so,"' the doctor told her.

There was a moment of silence

before the senior lady replied,

"I'm wondering, then,

just how serious is my condition

because this prescription is marked

'NO REFILLS'."

***********************



An older gentleman was

on the operating table

awaiting surgery

and he insisted that his son,

a renowned surgeon,

perform the operation.

As he was about to get the anesthesia,

he asked to speak to his son.

"Yes, Dad, what is it?"

"Don't be nervous, son;

do your best,

and just remember,

if it doesn't go well,

if something happens to me,

your mother

is going to come and

live with you and your wife...."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Aging:

Eventually you will reach a point

when you stop lying about your age

and start bragging about it. This is so true. I love

to hear them say "you don't look that old.."

---------------------------------



The older we get,

the fewer things

seem worth waiting in line for.

---------------------------------



Some people

try to turn back their odometers.

Not me!

I want people to know why

I look this way.

I've traveled a long way

and some of the roads weren't paved.

********************



When you are dissatisfied

and would like to go back to youth,

think of Algebra.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



You know you are getting old when

everything either dries up or leaks.

-------------------------------



One of the many things

no one tells you about aging

is that it is such a nice change

from being young.

~~~~~~~~~~~



Ah, being young is beautiful,

but being old is comfortable.

*********



First you forget names,

then you forget faces.

Then you forget to pull up your zipper....

it's worse when

you forget to pull it down.

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(And this final one especially for me,)

"Lord,

keep Your arm around my shoulder

and Your hand over my mouth!"



Now, if you feel this doesn't apply to you . . . stick around awhile . . .. it will!

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